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Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Mourning the loss of our Little One

We seem to give them back to Thee, 0 God,
who gavest them to us.
Yet as Thou didst not lose them in giving,
so we do not lose them by their return.
Not as the world giveth, givest Thou, 0 Lover of souls.
What Thou givest, Thou takest not away,
for what is thine is ours also if we are Thine.

And life is eternal and love is immortal,
and death is only an horizon,
and an horizon is nothing, save the limit of our sight.

Lift us up, strong Son of God, that we may see further;
cleanse our eyes that we may see more clearly;
draw us closer to thyself so that we may know ourselves to be
nearer to our loved ones who are with Thee.
And while Thou dost prepare a place for us,
prepare us also for that happy place,
that where Thou art we may be also for evermore. Bede Jarrett

The sonogram on Monday revealed that our baby has no heart beat( her twin never did ) and probably stopped growing around eight weeks gestation. In just thirteen weeks, the whole family has grown very attached to this wee one and we have become accustomed to including her in our plans for the future. As we mourn this loss, I am reminded that all things come from God - even these difficult losses. Even in our grief, I can see that the whole experience of anticipating this baby with excitement will reinforce the sanctity of life for my older children. For me, it renews my gratitude for my six thriving blessings and refreshes my memory that they are not really mine, but His.

We are looking into the "what's next" for this baby and a friend forwarded a terrific website that I think will be very helpful: and this one


Marilyn said...

Dear Michelle

I am so sorry. I will be praying for you and all the family.


jill said...

You guys are in our prayers. :(


I just found Faith and Family and am not even sure what blog is, unless it means open diary. I know Christmas had to be so incredibly hard for your family. We lost our baby Sept. 11, 2007, and I can only tell you you will never forget but it will get better. Thank you for being so brave to write about a subject others don't mention. Our babies are a value to our family no matter what age and we feel their loss because we are their mother.

MommaDunne said...

I just read your comment today -in May 2010. There were actually two babies in the very first sonogram and I can't remember why I decided not to put that in the post. Now , it feels almost as if I was denying it was a baby because the loss was so early- a very wordly way to look at it but the way that so many approached it that I suppose I felt I couldn't post about both twins.Peace to you.